How's My Day In UTAR Kampar?

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Friends?

Disclaimer: I'm gonna post something you might don't like or disagree. Any how, it's my voice that I have buried for long time whenever I met new bunch of friends. If you are offended, please discontinue reading and leave.

You have been warned.



In my life, I have meet a lot of new bunch of friends, from primary, secondary, pre-university and now the real life of university. Among all of them, the happiest moment I had is during my 6 years of primary school. Even though I was the only Chinese boy in a class, my Malay and Indian friends never abandoned me from boredom. I was being taught with multi-cultural stuffs and I glad I learnt something from them.
There was one particular chinese friend of mine is my first closest friend. Although we were in different class, most of the time, we used to stick together during assembly, during recess period and end of our school period. I remembered that he was from Penang and being transferred to my school since Standard 4. I approached him since he was alone. Since then, we were like brothers. When I entered to secondary school, he left Ipoh and migrated to Kuala Lumpur. After that, I had no chance to meet or contact him. I'm quite sad that time.

When I was in secondary and pre-university, I learnt a lot from my friends. I gained and have pain as well. Anyway, the pain I had is not as heavy as I had now.

Ignorance.

Silence.

Secrecy.


Betrayal.


Since I had them all now, I revised myself about the times when I help them constantly without thinking myself. I can't believe they turned their back on me. When they need help, they approached me and ask me to help them to do this and that. When they are done with it, I was being treated like an outcast.

What am I? A thing to be used when it's necessary and thrown away when it is useless?

They ask me to join their group during a class activity. They said I'm better to do the given task. What a mockery that they used me to do things.

So what? I'm not joining you guys despite I believe that you can do such work on your own. Guys, you are Year 3 students and you all should know how to do such simple task. Mistakes are meant to be learn but not to be avoided. Having mistake is better than never knowing them.
During in the lecture class, I want to sit near to a bunch of my friends. I had another group which sat at the first row of the class as well but I don't want because I want to do my FYP stuffs. One of my friend just said,

"Sorry. No place for you to sit in this row."

Actually there is but this friend of mine said it has been reserved for the 'other' friends. What the heck! So, is this means that I'm not your friend here? I know that you want to avoid me so I just sit somewhere alone. Just have a thought about what you have said. This is not the first time by the way.

Today, I was quite tired and asking one of my organizing committee member to bring something to me for society task. Since it was nighttime, she afraid to come out. Instead burden myself by looking her tomorrow in UTAR compound, I walked to her home. After having things done, I heard that the another friend of mine was happened to be at the next door. Since he said his laptop has some problem, I looked for him and settle the matter as soon as possible.

That time, I just realised that they were planning to make a surprise party to my committee members. I'm not angry, envy or whatsoever as I'm not invited to involve myself in the party. The main thing in my mind that time is to fix my friend's computer as soon as possible.

Then, one of my friend scolded me as if I let my committee member about her surprise party. He asked me why I can't do my things tomorrow or some other days.

Hey dude! Actually, I'm doing somebody's job and IT IS OFFICIAL. You think that the surprise party was darn official and secretive. Who's the one suffered in this situation? It's me! I was being scolded for nothing and you doesn't understand a single thing what I had. You just think that you can utter your words just like that without thinking twice.

Now, even he said sorry to me, I won't bother to accept his apology.
In conclusion, I made my mind.

I had it enough already.

I need to put a bold full stop to help people who doesn't deserve it.

I should think about more myself and others who deserve my help.

I don't want to fill up others necessities with my energy and time anymore.

It is the end.

---

For those who keep on reading this post and wants to gossip about my matter, keep your 'attitude' and let it consume yourself. I know you won't stop even though you read the disclaimer that I put.

I know who you are.




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